Friendship....
Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and
impossible to forget.
TRUE FRIENDSHIP "NEVER" ENDS. Friends are FOREVER.
The funny thing about human nature is that when things happen we are so quick to judge and assume and wait too late to apologize or say I'm sorry but I heard a ONCE good friend say "Most people walk in and out of your life, but only true friends leave footprints in your heart." And I've had one good friend who left footprints on my heart and the sad thing about it is, that I see the person almost everyday and we pass like nobody's business and I wouldn't be shamed to say I was mad in the beginning because I thought really highly of that person. I in turn distanced myself from there're attitude towards me becuase I felt they were being difficult and not mature enough to come and say how they felt about whatever transpired to cause a rift.
A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.
True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost.~ Charles Caleb Colton
Nevertheless I got over that because I figured to myself that if we were really true friends, they wouldn't listen to other people so I guess we weren't TRUE friends afterall. However I am not going to let the past hold me back; cause I'll be missing the good stuff.
So thought for the week is: Even though that you might "think" you are in the right and can justify you're actions for being mean or holding hatred against someone for whatever they did towards you,it doesn't mean that you cant forgive them. Nothing beats forgiveness because we don't know what we might do to someone and would want that person to forgive us. Don't allow pride and cloudy judgement to control our decisions, if you can't apologize before things are blown out of porportion then don't be vengeful. I am sorry I didn't apologize in the beginning but I know it was meant to be that way anyhow. SO if this week you happen to cross paths with someone who you think deserves a tongue lashing or a friend who you believed has betrayed you; think hard about your actions and their consequences before you loose a friend that you'll truly miss.
Love ya!
Friday, May 13, 2005
How to deal with feeling the "Blues"?
I just thought that adding this tid-bit might be an interesting subject for reading because I know for sure there will be somebody out there who may feels "depressed" about something in their life so this is my little "cheer-up" from one of my favourite websites.
The blues...Stop singing them.
Here's how Disappointments - nobody likes them. We all like to win and feel happy and powerful. But sometimes life has disappointments - whether it's being betrayed by a friend, having your boyfriend cheat on you, or not getting the job or into the school you want.
What happens to you when you get the blues? You have every right to feel sad. But can you process your feelings about a bad event while going on with your life? Or do the blues send you into a Stuart Smalley Shame Spiral that makes you feel horrible about everything in your life? The point is, when you get the blues, you need to get empowered again. That means taking steps to build your self-esteem from every angle.
Take care of yourself
Yeah, you know. Get a haircut, try new make up, but some new jeans. People do these things because they work. Why? They make you feel good. It's not about becoming a super model - it's about taking care of yourself.
Work out the stress
Working out helps relieve stress and makes you feel strong - watch out Xena! Vigorous exercise also stimulates endorphines -- the natural "feel good" chemical in our brains. (Some people call it the runner's high). Get in the pool, on the track, or on the court and play hard.
GIVE unto others
Studies have shown that the reason some economically disadvantaged people get depressed is because they can't afford to give. We're not suggesting buying gifts for all your friends. But giving of yourself, your time, energy, experience makes you feel powerful. It shows that you have so much you can afford to share. So find somewhere to volunteer - visit a nursing home, become a candy striper at a hospital, walk dogs at your local animal shelter. You'll feel great.
Feel ALL your feelings
Sometimes feeling sad or a little depressed colors everything. Try not to judge yourself or evaluate your life when you're bummed. Remember, you can feel more than one feeling at once -- so be sad about the disappointment, but find things to be happy and grateful about (a good grade, your home, a good friend). You'll see there's more good in your life than bad things. And by the way, don't stuff your feelings with food or smokes or booze. Stay present and face your emotions, then you can get to the other side.
When you can't get out
Some people are prone to depression and can't get out of the blues on their own. If you feel really stuck and start to feel like you can't handle your sad feelings - get some help. Don't be embarrassed. Most people have to seek professional help at some point in their lives. Take some actions - talk to a counselor at school, tell your parents, go to a teacher you trust and tell her you're having a hard time. Just taking this action will make you feel better - afterall, you've done something positive for yourself.
Adapted from beingagirl.com
Cheers......
The blues...Stop singing them.
Here's how Disappointments - nobody likes them. We all like to win and feel happy and powerful. But sometimes life has disappointments - whether it's being betrayed by a friend, having your boyfriend cheat on you, or not getting the job or into the school you want.
What happens to you when you get the blues? You have every right to feel sad. But can you process your feelings about a bad event while going on with your life? Or do the blues send you into a Stuart Smalley Shame Spiral that makes you feel horrible about everything in your life? The point is, when you get the blues, you need to get empowered again. That means taking steps to build your self-esteem from every angle.
Take care of yourself
Yeah, you know. Get a haircut, try new make up, but some new jeans. People do these things because they work. Why? They make you feel good. It's not about becoming a super model - it's about taking care of yourself.
Work out the stress
Working out helps relieve stress and makes you feel strong - watch out Xena! Vigorous exercise also stimulates endorphines -- the natural "feel good" chemical in our brains. (Some people call it the runner's high). Get in the pool, on the track, or on the court and play hard.
GIVE unto others
Studies have shown that the reason some economically disadvantaged people get depressed is because they can't afford to give. We're not suggesting buying gifts for all your friends. But giving of yourself, your time, energy, experience makes you feel powerful. It shows that you have so much you can afford to share. So find somewhere to volunteer - visit a nursing home, become a candy striper at a hospital, walk dogs at your local animal shelter. You'll feel great.
Feel ALL your feelings
Sometimes feeling sad or a little depressed colors everything. Try not to judge yourself or evaluate your life when you're bummed. Remember, you can feel more than one feeling at once -- so be sad about the disappointment, but find things to be happy and grateful about (a good grade, your home, a good friend). You'll see there's more good in your life than bad things. And by the way, don't stuff your feelings with food or smokes or booze. Stay present and face your emotions, then you can get to the other side.
When you can't get out
Some people are prone to depression and can't get out of the blues on their own. If you feel really stuck and start to feel like you can't handle your sad feelings - get some help. Don't be embarrassed. Most people have to seek professional help at some point in their lives. Take some actions - talk to a counselor at school, tell your parents, go to a teacher you trust and tell her you're having a hard time. Just taking this action will make you feel better - afterall, you've done something positive for yourself.
Adapted from beingagirl.com
Cheers......
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Are you having a burnout?
Burnt Out is actually the extreme form of work stress one can suffer....and is common cause of unhappiness at work place. Could be due to the present working environment eg multitasking, a new boss or team member, unclear or changing job targets, increasing higher targets.
All these can lead to burnout....which in turn lead to depression that may show up as suffering from physical, mental and emotional symptoms. Physical symptoms...as in frequeant illness like headaches, migraines, gastric pains, cold, diarrhoea and heart palpitations. And even raise a person's blood pressure that may lead to heart attack or strokes. For common emotional and mental symptoms may include the feelings of sadness, helplessness, emptiness or even a sense of losing control of the situation. There are warning signs of a crisis of suffering a burnout....getting sick more frequently, feeling sad, smoking or drinking more than usual, loss of appetite, sleeplessness, fatigue, sexual disfunctions, easily irritable, loss of confidence, becoming cynical, feeling of self-doubt, lack of motivation and new ideas.
There is a write-up in the newspaper about this subject...and it said that we should not look at burnout as a personal weakness or failure....but as a collective responsibility of the individual, the company ( meaning the management ) and the society. Lastly it is not really anybody's fault becoz people have different stress thresholds....some can juggle 2 or 3 stressful situations at the same time while others may not even cope with one. Even happy event like getting marry can put lots of stress on some ( getting cold feet at the last minute - remember the recent case in the US where the girl ran off and pretend to be kidnapped ), moving house, the death of a loved one or a change of job even due to a promotion. The perfectionists and the people with high expectations are more prone to burnout so are the same to the Mr Nice Guy types...And yes! the working mothers...they are more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety than men becoz their bearing a greater load both at home and at work. Teachers and those in the service industries who have to please both boss and clients (can be customers, students, parents ) are most likely to face stressful situations and suffer from burnout. Some companies are aware of this and are actively helping their employee to cope or deal with stress management while others will only learn the unfortunate way after something terrible like a suicide occurs.
People having this problem....and they also help themselves by first knowing that you have a burnout or close to having one then can start trying to tackle it which is the first step towards beating it. A vacation...some time away from the frency to realise that there is more to life than work. Talking about the problem with friends and family....remember this "a problem shared is a problem halved". Or the worst situation...people should also be realistic about their abilities and talk to their boss if they feel that they are being made to shoulder too much. In doing that, they are doing the company and themselves a favour. Balancing work and life helps....spending time with family, taking holidays, doing physical exercise and having hobbies are ways to combat burnout.....If when all else fails, then "quit" ( maybe easier said than done for most ) - people may be better off moving into another line of work altogether. Ask yourself this, "Is your job really worth giving your life for?", Then you will find your solution to the above.
All these can lead to burnout....which in turn lead to depression that may show up as suffering from physical, mental and emotional symptoms. Physical symptoms...as in frequeant illness like headaches, migraines, gastric pains, cold, diarrhoea and heart palpitations. And even raise a person's blood pressure that may lead to heart attack or strokes. For common emotional and mental symptoms may include the feelings of sadness, helplessness, emptiness or even a sense of losing control of the situation. There are warning signs of a crisis of suffering a burnout....getting sick more frequently, feeling sad, smoking or drinking more than usual, loss of appetite, sleeplessness, fatigue, sexual disfunctions, easily irritable, loss of confidence, becoming cynical, feeling of self-doubt, lack of motivation and new ideas.
There is a write-up in the newspaper about this subject...and it said that we should not look at burnout as a personal weakness or failure....but as a collective responsibility of the individual, the company ( meaning the management ) and the society. Lastly it is not really anybody's fault becoz people have different stress thresholds....some can juggle 2 or 3 stressful situations at the same time while others may not even cope with one. Even happy event like getting marry can put lots of stress on some ( getting cold feet at the last minute - remember the recent case in the US where the girl ran off and pretend to be kidnapped ), moving house, the death of a loved one or a change of job even due to a promotion. The perfectionists and the people with high expectations are more prone to burnout so are the same to the Mr Nice Guy types...And yes! the working mothers...they are more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety than men becoz their bearing a greater load both at home and at work. Teachers and those in the service industries who have to please both boss and clients (can be customers, students, parents ) are most likely to face stressful situations and suffer from burnout. Some companies are aware of this and are actively helping their employee to cope or deal with stress management while others will only learn the unfortunate way after something terrible like a suicide occurs.
People having this problem....and they also help themselves by first knowing that you have a burnout or close to having one then can start trying to tackle it which is the first step towards beating it. A vacation...some time away from the frency to realise that there is more to life than work. Talking about the problem with friends and family....remember this "a problem shared is a problem halved". Or the worst situation...people should also be realistic about their abilities and talk to their boss if they feel that they are being made to shoulder too much. In doing that, they are doing the company and themselves a favour. Balancing work and life helps....spending time with family, taking holidays, doing physical exercise and having hobbies are ways to combat burnout.....If when all else fails, then "quit" ( maybe easier said than done for most ) - people may be better off moving into another line of work altogether. Ask yourself this, "Is your job really worth giving your life for?", Then you will find your solution to the above.
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
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