Back to work after 4 days rest

Wah....so fast, just like having a blink of the eyes and now back to work. Now that work is no more a joy due to office's back-stabbers....work is a stressful thing. Yes! all the back-stabbing due to the unstable work situation....makes it looks like some people are more willing than others to back-stab. To me....these are the very people who can't really make it for their own merits or hard work, so "die die" will do whatever it takes to climb or just to stay around. The worst thing....is that the bosses are also more or less the same type, so same same hor! Well....just can't help to make things any easier for all.

My brother and his family will be visiting us from US on 10/7 to 22/7. Shit....gotto go to KL with them during my off days on 12/7 to 15/7 then again from 19/7 to 21/7.
They will stay with us....during my off days and will stay with his in-laws during my working days. Btw...I am not much of a good host, same same for my own family ( children and wife included ....in fact, they are even worst )

Now.....looking at things, not much to be interested in and what I really want to do or like to do....I don't have much of a "say" or "control" over it. In the end...I
just blink blink and hope for the best. EG....the rally for the stock market since 13th March till now. When the market crashed....I was "killed" but when market goes up, I was broke and just watch it goes up....just paralysis by fear of losing more money. Now...sold flat and in the end, got nothing much left after clearing of the earlier losses. Again....paralysis with fear about when to buy the next flat and so on. Buy to early....also mati, buy too late also mati! Now one thing is do right is that I don't buy the Newspapers ST everyday...more read more feel worst!!

Look at the situation in S'pore, things are not really that bad but look at the US and Euro....job losses are increasing even for those in Eastern Euro. Really having a worst time in their life. The rich...are still rich but the poor are getting poorer and their situation are just horrible. I really feel sad for them....same same for those 3th-world countries where finding food for their family is also a problem....not to mention housing and clean water. All basis stuffs are problem!
Not happy to see all these suffering by others....and it doesn't make me feel better too. Just make me "tired" watching all these hardships.

Now...frankly I spend more time at home with family....mainly with wife but she at times don't quite like my closeness. She said so...herself, funny but true when I am wanting to do the right thing. And don't quite like to bother others....I just sit and watch TV. Really makes me feel "old" and "useless". Big fear....if jobless or sick then I must draw up a exit plan for myself than waiting to die slowly. Yes....to
die is not really difficult thing to do, just gotto do it nicely or cleanly. Really don't want to wait till too sick or too poor or too old to do a damn thing about life. Sometimes....reading in the newspapers or on the news that some people die suddenly...frankly I wished to trade places with them. No....not that I am sick now or things like that, just feel "tired and sad" at times. Yes....also see old men having "fun" with young PRC ladies....but not for me, I don't feel good about it maybe due to "no kaki with this habit to start with" or due to lack of communication becoz my chinese sucks big time. Also knows....that the PRC loves an old fcuk like me for being me. Btw who the fcuk is me....a nobody and even wife finds me too troublesome becoz I want to go to gym or go for a swim with her. She rather sit at home with her pc....shit! Oh...now I do understand why the old men spend time to la kopi at coffeeshops with the PRC ladies. Yes...at least they got company while I sit alone staring at the TV till fell asleep. To just go out and spend time with others make me feel "guilt" as I know that time is not on my side esp now and in my situation. I am living on borrowed time....and everyday is a bonus

Wah....after today, there will be a 4 days "rest"

POWER...the pretty of my workplace is the rest days. After today...come morning and I am off for a 4 days of rest. MAN...such is nice thought, give me a great feeling esp after these few crazy days ( death of Farrah Fecwett and the great man himself...MJ ) really draining week.

And another thing....have discover how to make a really great tasting pork soup!!!
I hope to do more experiments to make it better the Founder's Bak Kut Teh at Balestier Road. Tried to cook once on Friday....and the result was encouraging really!!! Just got to fine tune it slightly and will come out with a super tasting soup!!!! hehehe. Well....if it can taste as good as Founder's then I have a great future as a cook in front of me just in case my present company went belly-up. Even if it is just cooking part-time for my honey...then it still a worth-it thingy when can see my honey finished the soup and smile!!! hehehe.

Now....sitting and reflecting on my own life.

After reading all the things said about the Jacko....all the true and false stuffs and at the end of it all, still believe he was a great superstar and a songwriter. Not to mention....a great dancer too.

When...looking at what he has done and achieved, wow what a waste now that he is gone. Just want to remember him for his music and his dance moves. What else he does will never change my thinking about him.

Now....after the above, as I sit alone and think back about how I tried to dance like him makes me laugh and at the same time...sad! Wow....he has been an icon for my generation and my generation is slowly moving on into the sunset ( mati ). It really sadden me that I am still around to witness the situation. I rather that I move on too....I am nothing as compared to this great man.

Yes...shaken by the death of jacko

Just cannot believed my eyes when I saw the news this morning in the internet about the death of Micheal Jackson....how could it be so? He is not that old and he is superstar. Man! it is really hard to get the sense of it all....until it slowly sink in that it is true that he was dead.

Rush...home and "on" the TV, and it was all over the news. I think his death is a greater impact to me than stateman! He is an icon....a music icon which I grew up listening to. Yes....his dancing is unbelieveable too. Yes....I was crying inside me that a great man is dead and gone! Yes....I agreed he was a strange man but I am used to the idea that he was like that.

Yes....I am very sad about his death and true that I find him weird at most times, his music is really great! Played his music at my co's juke-box for 3 songs at $1, still like his earlier songs from the Thriller ablum.

Hope he will be in peace now.....I saluted u, Micheal Jackson and I would gladly exchange places with you so that you can continue with the come-back shows in UK which many of his young and old fans who had bought tickets to see....now is gone for good.

Thu - 25/6

So fast....school holiday about to be over soon and the roads will be jammed pack too. Even the ERP will increased in prices too. Anyway....what else is new?

Still no luck with the 4D and toto and getting used to stay in the condo and is using some of the facalities for a change. Eg the swimming pools and the gym. Also went up the Bt Timah hill....for the third time.

Work...well, slightly better with more up-side orders lately. Meaning more works for all which is a good thing.

Health....having more aches and pains lately too, could be due to more swimming and work-outs at the gym? Getting old...so the bones and muscles cannot take it hehehe?
Yeah....about money, yes! still got some worries esp without owning a home can be a huge worry in the long run still the price of housing increases. My guess is as good as others as to whether when the big increase in price for housing. At the moment, the rental for the condo is manageable. And I am thankful for that.

Today...Friday

Felt better after a good sleep from morning till nearly 5pm....esp after taking the medicine. No chest pain till now.....and less back ache too.

At work....also not so much stresses as I know that today's commit and mep accuracy thingy should be settled by the day team since I counter-check and ensure everything is in order before I went home this morning. True enough....everything is as per my plan. With this....I was also able to sleep in peace not like other Fridays.

For my own things....everything is smooth and staying in the condo is also pretty good experience. Able to enjoy the many facilities together with family. Really nice
to be able to bond better with them and no need to go for holiday. Save money and still enjoy.

There are a couple issues that does bother me lately.....my brother coming over for a visit with his family and honey's loan thingy. Beside these 2 issues...I am as free as a bird. Brother thingy....still may have solution as they can go stay with his wife's family and maybe just stay a day or so...at my place. Honey's loan thingy is more tricky to handle....just don't have a good feeling about it honestly speaking.

wah....feel better now after seeing the doctor

Had a hard time last Sat till Monday....back aches like shit plus chest pain too. Painful even just sitting up. Took some medicine for high blood pressure plus pain killer....I managed to last till I see the doctor on monday at Sin Ming. Hahaha my old family doctor....don't want to see my co's doctor even I don't mind paying cash for it. Reason....no record mah.

He checked my blood pressure and he was okay with it....has came down to 145/85-90. So he just gave me medicines for the aches and pains. After taking them...had a really peaceful sleep for these 3 nights. I really felt very much better then anytime for the last month or so.

Today....also managed to sleep from last night till this afternoon to about 3pm. If not for waking up to piss, I would sleep till 5pm.